December 1 was a very significant day. It was when the big, red panic button that is center of my forehead was pushed with full force. OMG, we are in December. I will be having Christmas, my family and a baby all within this one month. These four weeks. And now THREE weeks. It is unreal to me. Is it common to still not have your head completely wrapped around the concept of a baby this far along in pregnancy?? No, those movements are not indigestion...they are caused by another human that is living among your internal organs!! It has ears, feet, hands, fingers, eyes, maybe hair, maybe boy parts...and it is all inside of YOU! For some reason, as much as I DO know that there is a real baby in there, the majority of my brain is just tuned out of the reality that we are about to bring another human being into this world. And WE have to take care of it. See?? Even writing that doesn't jar me into the reality of the situation.
As most of you know, I have been pretty stressed out since my 32 week ultrasound. Stupid, bad ultrasound tech telling me my baby was breech and talking to me about the benefits of a C Section (including a prettier baby). So, for the last 5 weeks, I have been obsessing about the position of this baby. Poor thing has been poked and prodded by both Mommy and Daddy to see if we could tell what part was what and where the head/butt was at...is that a foot? Or could it be an elbow?? Hiccups are low. Could that be a good sign? Or is that a bad sign?? Everyday. Non-stop. Whenever baby moved a muscle, I was ON IT to see if I could tell what it was. I never could.
Black Friday we did nine hours of shopping and that took a toll on me and Cashew. There were times that I felt like he/she was just going to come right out from between my legs on the mall floor between Dillards and Eddie Bauer. There were pings, pains and electric zolts going on in areas I won't specify and my pee breaks were more frequent and more urgent. But I refused to stop shopping - and T was willing to stop whenever I needed to - we were just getting so much done! We even finished up our shopping for Cashew! But I did wonder, with all the pressure down low and the mysterious pains down yonder, if baby's head was bouncing off my cervix with every step. I tried not to get my hopes up and kept trying to just wrap my head around a C Section. I also kept a firm grip on the bottom of my belly so that I could hold in the bowling ball that felt like it was on its way out the chute!
Fast forward to my doc appointment yesterday. T couldn't go with me because he had to go out of town for work so my mother-in-law, Stephanie, went with me. We took a new route to the office (which is next door to the hospital) that was A LOT faster than the route T and I have been taking. This will be, what I now term, my labor route! We ended up getting to the doc office 30 minutes early for my 2:45 appointment. That's good and bad. Always good to be early but I was hoping that we wouldn't waste our time sitting in the lobby until my appointment.
But, sure enough, they took my back within 10 or so minutes of being there. Steph came along. Of course, the scale came first and, since I am getting close to the end and since Thanksgiving just took place, I will just casually skip over that specific. I did the pee test...yep, a little bit landed on my hand but most of it was in the cup. I am getting better at the blind pee catching (that should be an Olympic sport!). All good there. Then we headed to the sonogram room. The nurse took my BP, looked GREAT. Asked if the baby was moving. A LOT I said. Great. As she was walking out, she instructed me to undress from the waist down. Gulp. Ummm, ok. Pretty awkward since my MIL was in there with me and we both thought we were just doing a sono. But Steph stepped out and I did as I was told. After covering myself with the piece of paper they give you for privacy, I waited for Steph and the doc to come back in.
Now, honestly...in the back of my mind I was wondering if I would be having an internal exam this trip. I was thinking that it was the last month that the internal exams began at each appointment. Guess I was right. I was glad that I shaved my legs in anticipation of that possibility. Yes, I know. The docs don't really care. But I do! I sure wouldn't want their jobs and would like to make their jobs as easy (and clean) as possible.
Anyway, back to the visit. Hutch came in shortly after and went right to the sonogram after I voiced my 5 week concern about the position of the baby. She squirted the goop on my belly and put the wand down low. "There's the head!!" She said. I don't know how heavy the weight was on my shoulders but it must have been more than I have ever lifted because, after she exclaimed the exciting news, I felt like I was floating above the table! I was so happy and relieved. I did ask if it could turn back - like a million times. She assured me that the odds were ridiculously low that it will turn back to breech at this point in the game. I felt tears welling up in my eyes and was just so incredibly happy that Baby Spencer, little Cashew, was being such a great team player!!
She waved the magic wand all over my belly checking other things about Cashew. Head size is perfect. Abdominal cavity is perfect. We saw it breathing. We saw an ear (that looks like T's ear!). We saw a perfectly shaped foot, some hands and the right amount of amniotic fluid. Only one time did Steph and I have to look away while she glided over the part that would be the spoiler of our great surprise. Not that either of us would have know what we were looking at!! She had to point everything out to us because, when they get this big, it is just too hard to tell what's what. She did give me a whole roll of pictures but I think it would be too hard to decipher if I put them on here.
Right now, Cashew is weighing in at 6.5 lbs (which is right where it should be) and is right on schedule as far as development. After my sono, Hutch did a quick internal which didn't hurt at all! She was just checking my cervix for dilation. NONE! This is good news! I wasn't planning on having a baby for another three or so weeks!! I have too much to get done before then! Haha! So, at 37 weeks, no dilation and no effacement as of yet. Take your time, Baby Cashew.
I floated out of the office feeling light as a feather and emotionally exhausted. I didn't realize how much the "breech" thing was getting to me. I even felt better about being able to get everything done in time - and, I also felt better that, if I didn't get it done, it was ok. Well, kinda ok. I am still a perfectionist!! Anyway, I am just glad to know that Cashew is trying so hard. It was one of my first very proud Mommy moments. I am so proud of my little Cashew. Way to dive!
Because of my mental exhaustion, a grocery trip and a Christmas project I was working on last night, I am a day late with my 37 week pic. But here it is:
So, other than minor morning sickness (or all day sickness) of first tri and a small bout of food poisoning at 5 weeks, I have been very healthy during this entire pregnancy. Until today. Seems I am fighting a head cold. I started feeling some of the symptoms last night and then, this morning, it was a snot fest! But I am not going to let it get me down. I have WAY too much to do to worry about a head cold. So, I took a hot shower and will be moving right into Project Christmas immediately following this blog entry. Wish me luck!
Here is Christmas corner at our house with our new "fake" tree that we love. No more needles to vacuum. No more dead trees posing a fire hazard. Just an easy to assemble, prelit, 7.5 foot tree with most of our ornaments finding a home. T is hoping to make a very cool stocking stand that will look like a lamp post. We have about 12 stockings to hang so that will be very cool! It will be to the left of the tree where the back of the couch is. I am kinda excited about it!!
I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving and that you are enjoying the official holiday season. This one will be a bit crazy for us but we are looking forward to visiting with my family and doing all the fun, traditional Christmas festivities in Tucson.
Next on the list:
Doc appt: 12/8 at 2 PM
Infant Care Class: 12/9 7PM - 9 PM
PS...Just to let everyone know. I know that there is ALWAYS a chance that a C Section would have to happen for emergency reasons. I am not anti-C Section but I am glad that, as of now, things can go on a bit more natural. If a C Section has to happen to protect me, Cashew or both, I am, obviously, prepared for that. This is just one less worry for now...
I just want to let you know that you look so cute and snuggly in there. It was good to see you yesterday. And I think you were trying to wave since there was a ton of movement and your hands were in front of your face. Hutch thinks you look perfect and that you are growing right on target. Even better? You are head down!! I am so proud of you! Good job, my little diver!
Everyone is anxious for you to get here. I am anxious in a lot of ways. I am just hoping that I will do ok and be a good Mommy. I am hoping that somehow I can remain stress free in these last weeks so that I don't stress you out. But I certainly can't guarantee that! This is a crazy time of year.
But, Cashew, it is the most WONDERFUL time of the year as well. And your birthday is going to fall right among the excitement of the season. Some may think this is bad but I think we will have a great time and that you will enjoy your birthday and Christmas! People have their lights up on their houses and trees in their living rooms. No one will forget how special your birthday is and, I promise, you will not get jipped out of gifts - both birthday AND Christmas. Santa will take good care of you. And maybe we have a fun summer celebration for you to break up the year. Maybe a pool party or a party in the park. Whatever the case may be, always know that you will make this Christmas season THE BEST that Daady and I have ever had. And we will always look forward to celebrating your life every minute, every hour, everyday, and every year.
We love you so much already,
Mommy and Daddy